Writing Out Your Grief

Soon after I lost CJ I began seeing a therapist. She helped me with so many things. One very important piece of advice she gave me was that writing could help with this grief journey. She was right.

She told me that for the first couple of years, it would be important to write things down because I wouldn’t remember anything. She also told me that writing can be cathartic and help to navigate this journey.

Writing in my journal has become a part of my day, everyday. It has truly helped me to navigate through this journey nobody wants to be on.

I actually have a number of journals. I write about my days to keep the memories fresh. I write to help understand my feelings. Most important, every day, without fail, I write to CJ.

I write to him about my day. I write to him about something I wanted to talk to him about, but couldn’t. I find on those days if I listen with my heart, I can hear him, giving me advice.

Through this whole grief journey, I have thought about writing a book. I didn’t know what that would look like. I just knew I wanted to keep CJ's memory alive in the written word. I had so many ideas running through my head. Over the years I wrote a few chapters but it never felt quite right.

After walking this path for a while, I realized I also wanted to share what it was like to live with the grief that is really love.

In the last few weeks, the book has taken form in my head, and I am invested in the writing. The book will be both about him, and the journey I took with him here on earth and the journey I’m taking with him now, living in my heart.

I was worried about writing a book and having my life with him judged. My memories are so important, I wanted to be sure sharing them was the right thing to do.

I came to the realization that the book and the telling of the story, well it’s for me. To help on this grief journey. If others appreciate the telling of the story or find comfort in it, well then as CJ would say, that will just be gravy on the mashed potatoes Lol

Now, time to start writing :) with CJ in my head and heart guiding the way